The soon to be grandparents (and auntie) have been desperate to buy things for flash.
I said no. Not until the 12 week scan shows all is OK! I know there was a heartbeat at 7 weeks. That doesn’t mean there will be one at 12 weeks. I try to be realistic about these kinds of things. I also worry as I was part of a group on baby centre. It was full of lovely women who went through IVF around the same time and were all due baby in May 2019 as a result. They were an amazing support and we all shared tips on how we got through certain aspects of the process. However, around the 7 week mark for each of us the numbers dwindled as some poor women had their “viability scan” to discover there was no heartbeat. Again condolences and support were offered to those who needed it while still trying to be upbeat for those who were getting good news of a nice healthy heartbeat (in some cases two!!!). This made reality sink in a little. Nothing in this process was guaranteed.
As my 12 week scan approached there were quite a few on the board going before me (I’m not due til the end of May so am one of the last for each scan!). Again numbers started to dwindle. Baby stopped growing at 9 weeks or there was barely a heartbeat, back in a few days to check again see if it keeps going or stops, baby is measuring far too small they don’t think it will survive.
People don’t typically in a “normal” environment share these kinds of stories. So no-one really thinks about it. You only hear about the scans that went well as that’s when people make their announcements. If people are unfortunate enough not to have a successful scan very few people actually ever find out.
I now had the fear. What if I was going to be one of those poor unlucky women who had went through all of this only to fall near the end of the (first) tunnel, just as I was starting to see light! I had to take a step back from the board. As much as these women had helped me through this, it was not doing my anxiety any favours to see the other side of the coin. At the same time it stopped me being excited about my baby. I had to take some time away!
November 13th. 9am. St John’s Hospital in Livingston. 12 week scan.
All OK! A very very active baby! So much so I had to do all sorts of routines on the wee bed to try and get them into the right position. Every time she thought she was getting the right view, baby would start rolling and dancing about.
Put your feet flat on the bed. Lift your hips and shake. . . .I did. Felt like a fool. Had to do it twice but the little one was not playing ball. Instead being camera shy and avoiding the appropriate measurements being taken.
Everyone says you relax after the 12 week scan. Time starts to pass quicker. There’s less worry.
Not true. We decided to have all the screening done for chromosomal disorders etc. I’m very much of the opinion when I’m getting myself into something the more information you have the better prepared you can be. So all measurements were taken for that.
If you don’t hear anything in the next 7-10 days it’s usually an indication it’s low risk. Your midwife will just give you the results at your 16 week appointment.
So all this means is from the day of the scan onwards there’s a little niggle in the back of my mind. What if…?
10ish days after my scan, I get an NHS letter. Slight panic. I open it. I see it’s a results sheet. A bit more panic. Read it. Phew…..big BIG sigh of relief. My midwife had posted the result out for me to file in my notes and had highlighted LOW RISK (1 in 9100 to be exact).
Now to find something else to worry about for the next 24+ weeks haha!