So. I thought the 2 week wait was torture. Nothing would ever be that bad.
Going from that blood test and positive result to waiting 3 weeks for a ‘viability scan’ was brutal! What if there wasn’t a heart beat? I had to just try and not think about it. However it was all I could think about.
Worry, worry and more worry. Every twinge, cramp pain was just terrifying to me. I found it such a hard time. Although I thought to myself, women who do not go through IVF don’t get a 7 week scan….They do a home pregnancy test, notify their GP/midwife then wait for the 12 week scan. How do they do it?? That’s all I could think, how the hell do they cope? Maybe they don’t? I don’t know – had I conceived naturally would it have seemed as tortuous?
I got through it (who knew!) and along came the 7 week scan. Another internal ultrasound. Joy. This time though it was more than worth it. Hearing the doctor say “there’s your baby. That little flashing white dot is the heartbeat.” Relief. I have never felt relief like it.
That little blob in the middle of the black splodge is our baby. Their 2nd ever picture lol!
Now for me to say that all I could think about in those 3 weeks was the scan and worry around that is a slight fib. I also thought a lot about the nausea and occasional vomiting. I thought I couldn’t feel worse. WRONG!!!!
The week after our 7 week scan we had some annual leave. That’s when the proverbial sh!t hit the fan. I was vomiting 3 to 4 time per day EVERY day. I felt crap. I looked crap. I couldn’t eat. I could barley drink. In the next 2 weeks I lost 7lbs (normally I’d have been thrilled let me tell you!!) and this worried me. Was it having a negative impact?
Eventually it got to the point where I wasn’t even keeping water down. When it got to over 24hours since the last thing I ate/drank stayed down I called the doctor. The cyclizine they had prescribed me a few weeks earlier wasn’t working. I was being sick despite that and now was keeping nothing down so couldn’t even take the damn pills! They put me on to my midwife. She contacted the hospital and I was sent up to the early pregnancy unit.
I was anxious, felt and looked crap and was very cranky. My long suffering other half (I’m sure the last few weeks has felt like eternity to him!) drove me to the hospital. They done all the usual tests, thankfully in the 24 hours of zero intake I hadn’t become totally dehydrated! Although I was headed there if I didn’t start keeping something down. They gave me an injection to stop the vomiting and said so long as I kept some water down I could go home to rest. This took a while with every sip I took coming back up within a few minutes. Eventually it kicked in and the water stayed down. Hurrah! I didn’t need to stay in hospital. They changed my tablets to ondansitron (a different more expensive anti-emetic) and sent me on my way with a letter for my GP stating I had hyperemesis gavardium (severe morning sickness). Lucky me.
The next day I felt more human so went back to work, but took it easy. The nausea was still there, but I hadn’t been sick.
In the next few weeks I went from being sick every day multiple times to being sick once on average every 8 or 9 days!! I took this as a win.
During this time EVERYONE who knew said the sickness is a good thing! I should be glad as it means the hormones are building up and baby is doing fine. I was not glad. I was questioning why the hell people voluntarily done this to themselves more than once!!!!! (In my opinion At this point younger siblings – myself included – were lucky to be here)
At the time of writing I am between 11 and 12 weeks. I will be approx. 12+4 when I get my scan. Another wise input from the EVERYONE who knows is “you will feel better around 12-13 weeks” apparently that’s when the sickness goes away. I made a promise to each and every person who assured me this. My promise was if my sickness wasn’t gone by 13 weeks as per their promise I would be hunting them down!
I am currently a crabbit crabbit woman.
My other half deserves a medal. If after reading this you see him….give him a handshake/hug. He deserves it. I’ve been a demon!